The Complete Richard Dick Mysteries by Wade J. McMahan

Author:Wade J. McMahan [McMahan, Wade J.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Mystery
Publisher: Untreed Reads Publishing
Published: 2014-03-15T00:00:00+00:00

The Lincoln Park Horror

You meet all kinds in my line of work. The swells, the mugs—in fact, I met this Madame once with the biggest… Ahem, I’ll put that story on hold ’til later. You see, I want to tell you about a case…and I assure you that I’m the only private dick in the world that can say this…a case where my client was an honest to god—ghost!

Oh sure, I know what you’re thinking, but maybe you’ll change your mind after you’ve heard the entire story. It all began on a day that seemed custom-tailored for ghosts….

* * *

Business was slow, my caseload as empty as my checkbook. My chair leaned back against my desk as I gazed through my office window at Chicago’s dreary, fog-enshrouded streets and reviewed my equally dreary financial status. Let’s see now, client accounts currently due, zero; client accounts past due, zero; accounts payable…um…urgent.

I swiveled my chair around to my desk, and my heart jumped into my throat, “SWEET JESUS, JOSEPH AND MARY!”

While I was sitting deep in thought with my back to the room, a man had silently entered my office and seated himself in front of my desk. He wore a three-piece wool suit, white shirt with a high collar, and bow tie. His eyes blinked within a middle-aged, aristocratic face as they wandered about the room in a peculiar, seemingly disoriented manner.

“I regret that I startled you, Mr. Dick,” he began in a refined voice, “but I didn’t wish to disrupt your musings. You are the private detective, Mr. Richard Dick, I assume?”

He hadn’t startled me, he’d scared the piss out of me. “That’s okay. I’m sorry. I didn’t hear you come in. I guess my mind was wandering. Yes, I’m Richard Dick, and you are Mr.…?”

“Buttersnipe. Percival J. Buttersnipe. Mr. Dick, I have a serious dilemma on my hands, and I need you, or someone like you, to carry out a series of missions on my behalf.”

“Well, Mr. Buttwipe…”

“Buttersnipe!”

“Oh yeah, Buttersnipe…heh, sorry.”

“Mr. Dick, I was here last May, but found you gone.”

I scratched my head for a moment, “May? Let’s see… Got it! I was working a case in Wareville in May.”

“Wareville? Where is that?”

“It’s a small town in Missouri.”

“You don’t say! It sounds positively hideous. I also attempted to visit with you a month or so ago.”

I nodded, “Last month I was working a case in Vidalia, Georgia. You know…where the onions come from.”

“Upon my word! How dreadful for you! Perhaps now you will appreciate assisting me here in the relative civilization of Chicago.”

“Maybe. Tell me what you have in mind, and perhaps we can do business. By the way, please just call me Dick.”

“Very well,” he frowned, “Dick it shall be, although I cannot say that I approve of such casual familiarity in a business setting.”

“I know exactly what you mean, Percy, and I agree with you one hundred percent.”

“Percy? But, you said…oh, never mind. Let me see now, where was I? Oh yes, you see Dick, I first explained my problems to Mr.

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